Raw

I'm feeling a little raw from radiation-physically, not mentally:) Kinda hard to sit in a chair-too painful-but otherwise I'm feeling awesome!! Its really made me realize the past week or so that I must have been sick for a long time, looking back on how cruddy I felt thru my whole pregnancy (and even before) and especially afterwards. At the time I chalked it up to being the 2nd pregnancy and having to attempt to keep up with a 2 yr old, and then just not being as fast to recuperate from a 2nd CSection and having to keep up with 2 kiddos. Its awesome to know that I was sick, and that I won't feel that cruddy forever:) I'm already feeling SOOOO much better. My fatigue has faded-its still there but not even half as bad, and most of the pain is gone. Now just gotta hurry up and wait for the radiation side effects to subside. ONLY FIVE MORE TREATMENTS!!! It has gone by SO fast! I can honestly say that while I will not miss facing that every single day and making the trip each afternoon, I'll miss my radiation zappers:) They are an amazing group of people and their attitudes make it a bearable process. I'm not sure what the check up process is but I know they will be making a decision of whether I'll have to do more treatments and/or possible internal treatments. Please pray that next Thursday is FINITO!!! While I know that it will be awesome to be done, its not over-this is a lifetime thing that I will live with. I know every bump, twinge, pain, discharge, sniffle, etc will bring fear to my heart and I will just have to remain vigilant in listening to my body and not being afraid of feeling stupid for seeing a doctor for every little thing-it saved my life by doing it this time!! Just have to find the balance between the fear and knowing when something just isn't right and seeking medical advice.

Thanks for all the prayers, love, food, and support!!!